Psychohosebeast, 55

chronic 'medical' issues make daily-life 'difficult,' and my quality-of-life 'poor,' much of the time.

nearly, every moment, every day, i'm inside my apartment (i.e. "a recluse"). i maintain no relationships (apart from my parents—and a community case-management worker).

socially, i'm awkward; alienated & isolated 'to the max.' i'm resigned, to this situation; it's not 'my choice.'

often, i find myself repeating, aloud, a 'mantra:' "i'm tired* (& lonely, & bored)!" (* might-mean: weary, uncomfortable, fatigued, achey, ambivalent, uncertain, uneasy, demoralised, discouraged, discontented, unhappy, miserable, overwhelmed, dissociative…)

simpatico relationships would benefit me; especially, if this could get me 'out,' more.

for my self-portraits, i don't 'smile' (in-part, because, i loathe 'pretention'—'for the hell-of-it,' i feigned a 'cheerful' demeanor, for one (1)).

assessed/diagnosed as autism spectrum (2022; i.e. asperger's syndrome).

perfunctory, prior diagnosis of schizoid personality*. original diagnosis of schizotypal personality* ('94). (* without satisfying diagnostic criteria)

hobbies & interests: collecting found objects, radio. (listening), music-appreciation

miscellaneous (and/or social justice): suicide prevention*, do not resuscitate*,
medically assisted death*, euthanasia pro-choice*, dignified death*, assisted suicide* (* advocate)

love language (ranking): quality time, acts of service, physical touch, receiving gifts, words of affirmation